Racism is what the mind of the man taught us.
People Choose to be racist.
Racism is what the mind of the man taught us.
People Choose to be racist.
6 years ago a guy looked at me face to face, and boldly told me; “I don’t like you!”
I immediately fired a response, I asked him that day; “Thank you for the honest feedback, but those that you like, how has it made their life better? How does your liking people pay their bills or take a bank loan? My brother keep your like, I need God’s like And that’s what guarantees my future.
Today I joined a CEO friend of mine in an interview Panel to recruit some new staff, it was a long session, as we returned from a coffee break to continue the hectic interview session, here was this same guy walked in with his grey jacket and CV coming for the interview.
Our eyes kissed by fluke, we immediately recognised eachother; “the world is indeed spherical”, I soliloquized.
He felt very uncomfortable through out the interview, one could clearly see the volcanic eruption ongoing in his whole nervous system, he even mistook his date of birth for his last date of employment. It wasn’t yet my turn to ask him questions so I allowed everyone to take their turns with him and deliberately opted to interview him last.
When it got to my turn, the first thing I said was, “I LIKE YOU so much, you look to me like a brilliant and intelligent person, but it seems you are not doing well now because something bothers you, true?”
“That’s very correct Ma!” He responded.
“Ok look at me straight in the eye, I was never offended that day, it is very normal that sometimes as humans you just don’t like certain people, but I wasn’t bothered either, because whether you liked me or not, it was inconsequential to my life and my success path – as you can see, fate has brought you to my lair”
I stood up and beckoned him to come and embrace me, everyone on the panel at this point were at sea – wondering if we had expeditiously recast an interview session to a Hollywood movie scene.
He hugged me so long and deeply that I felt it. Then I told him, “now get your confidence back bro and answer the questions like a Pro Shark that you are, we all burst into laughter, everyone suddenly liked him and the room became livelier – the interview became more like a discussion, well to cut the long story short, he got the job!
1. Be careful how you treat people when they appear to be in their vulnerable state, your next level may be hanging in their balance; somewhere in the future.
2. If you dislike someone, it is not their fault, it is YOUR FAULT, work on yourself to find good in people and reinvent your Mind to see everyone as likeable.
3. Don’t spew hatred vocally just because it came into your heart, you may say it to someone who will keep it forever and use it against you when you find yourself in your own low moments and need them.
4. Learn to forgive, overlook people’s dislike and hatred for you, dont punish people just because you have the position and privilege to do so, bless them rather – that’s how you court God’s blessings, favour and protection.
When you step into the world of dating, many may come along and claim that they are perfect for you. Then how do you distinguish the genuinely good ones from the bad ones? Listed below are some traits that you must look out for in a perfect partner.
If they can’t stay loyal, they will not be able to love you enough. You will never be happy with a person like that. No matter what happens, never date a philanderer.
Maturity refers to knowing how to behave in a particular place and a particular time. Maturity does not depend upon the age of a person. It is attained through sufficient experience.
This refers to someone who has the potential to keep you happy. Don’t date someone who will only depend on you for every single thing.
Commitment is very important in a relationship. Look out for someone who wishes to have a long term relationship with you. Run away from a person who keeps changing his mind
Go for someone who can make you feel secured both physically, emotionally and financially.
Go for someone who will not only respect you but also respect those who are important to you.
7. Good sense of humor.
Go for someone who will make life lively for you. Laughter heals wounds & act as catalyst in r/s.
Go for someone who shares similar hobbies, taste, preferences like you to avoid clash of interest.
Go for someone who is more intelligent and wiser than you.
10. Romantic & affectionate.
Go for someone who can make you feel special.
11. Easy to understand.
Go for someone who you can easily blend with.
Go for someone who is sensitive to your feelings and needs.
IF YOU HAVE GOTTEN ONE, PLEASE DON’T LET HIM GO.
By Paul M. Wakawa
CO-INCIDENCE OF LIFE:
1. CHURCH has 6 letters so does MOSQUE.
2. BIBLE has 5 letters so does QURAN.
3. DEAD has 4 letters so does LIFE.
4. HATE has 4 letters, so does LOVE.
5. ENEMIES has 7, so does FRIENDS.
6. LYING has 5, so does TRUTH.
7. HURT has 4, so does HEAL.
8. NEGATIVE has 8, so does POSITIVE.
9. FAILURE has 7, so does SUCCESS.
10. BELOW has 5, but so does ABOVE.
11. CRY has 3 letters so does JOY.
12. ANGER has 5 so does HAPPY.
13. WRONG has 5 so does RIGHT.
14. POOR has 4 so does RICH.
15. FAIL has 4 so does PASS
16. IGNORANCE has 9 so does KNOWLEDGE.
Are they all by Co-incidence? We should Choose wisely, this means LIFE is like a Double-Edged Sword.
Do you Agree???
I saw this post online a few year ago, i can relate to must of what the writer said, I will Love to share with you too.
I don’t think about the past or regret things much these days. But sometimes I wish that I had known some of things I have learned over the last few years a bit earlier. That perhaps there had been a self-improvement class in school. And in some ways there probably was.
Because some of the things in this article a teacher probably spoke about in class. But I forgot about them or didn’t pay attention.
Some of it would probably not have stuck in my mind anyway. Or just been too far outside my reality at the time for me to accept and use.
But I still think that taking a few hours from all those classes and use them for some personal development classes would have been a good idea. Perhaps for just an hour a week in high school. It would probably be useful for many students and on a larger scale quite helpful for society in general.
So here are 16 things I wish they had taught me in school (or I just would like to have known about earlier).
1. The 80/20 rule.
This is one of the best ways to make better use of your time. The 80/20 rule – also known as The Pareto Principle – basically says that 80 percent of the value you will receive will come from 20 percent of your activities.
So a lot of what you do is probably not as useful or even necessary to do as you may think.
You can just drop – or vastly decrease the time you spend on – a whole bunch of things.
And if you do that you will have more time and energy to spend on those things that really brings your value, happiness, fulfillment and so on.
2. Parkinson’s Law.
You can do things quicker than you think. This law says that a task will expand in time and seeming complexity depending on the time you set aside for it. For instance, if you say to yourself that you’ll come up with a solution within a week then the problem will seem to grow more difficult and you’ll spend more and more time trying to come up with a solution.
So focus your time on finding solutions. Then just give yourself an hour (instead of the whole day) or the day (instead of the whole week) to solve the problem. This will force your mind to focus on solutions and action.
The result may not be exactly as perfect as if you had spent a week on the task, but as mentioned in the previous point, 80 percent of the value will come from 20 percent of the activities anyway. Or you may wind up with a better result because you haven’t overcomplicated or overpolished things. This will help you to get things done faster, to improve your ability to focus and give you more free time where you can totally focus on what’s in front of you instead of having some looming task creating stress in the back of your mind.
Boring or routine tasks can create a lot of procrastination and low-level anxiety. One good way to get these things done quickly is to batch them. This means that you do them all in row. You will be able to do them quicker because there is less start-up time compared to if you spread them out. And when you are batching you become fully engaged in the tasks and more focused.
A batch of things to do in an hour today may look like this: Clean your desk / answer today’s emails / do the dishes / make three calls / write a grocery shopping list for tomorrow.
4. First, give value. Then, get value. Not the other way around.
This is a bit of a counter-intuitive thing. There is often an idea that someone should give us something or do something for us before we give back. The problem is just that a lot of people think that way. And so far less than possible is given either way.
If you want to increase the value you receive (money, love, kindness, opportunities etc.) you have to increase the value you give. Because over time you pretty much get what you give. It would perhaps be nice to get something for nothing. But that seldom happens.
5. Be proactive. Not reactive.
This one ties into the last point. If everyone is reactive then very little will get done. You could sit and wait and hope for someone else to do something. And that happens pretty often, but it can take a lot of time before it happens.
A more useful and beneficial way is to be proactive, to simply be the one to take the first practical action and get the ball rolling. This not only saves you a lot of waiting, but is also more pleasurable since you feel like you have the power over your life. Instead of feeling like you are run by a bunch of random outside forces.
6. Mistakes and failures are good.
When you are young you just try things and fail until you learn. As you grow a bit older, you learn from – for example – school to not make mistakes. And you try less and less things.
This may cause you to stop being proactive and to fall into a habit of being reactive, of waiting for someone else to do something. I mean, what if you actually tried something and failed? Perhaps people would laugh at you?
Perhaps they would. But when you experience that you soon realize that it is seldom the end of the world. And a lot of the time people don’t care that much. They have their own challenges and lives to worry about.
And success in life often comes from not giving up despite mistakes and failure. It comes from being persistent.
When you first learn to ride your bike you may fall over and over. Bruise a knee and cry a bit. But you get up, brush yourself off and get on the saddle again. And eventually you learn how to ride a bike. If you can just reconnect to your 5-year-old self and do things that way – instead of giving up after a try/failure or two as grown-ups often do you would probably experience a lot more interesting things, learn valuable lessons and have quite a bit more success.
7. Don’t beat yourself up.
Why do people give up after just few mistakes or failures? Well, I think one big reason is because they beat themselves up way too much. But it’s a kinda pointless habit. It only creates additional and unnecessary pain inside you and wastes your precious time. It’s best to try to drop this habit as much as you can.
8. Assume rapport.
Meeting new people is fun. But it can also induce nervousness. We all want to make a good first impression and not get stuck in an awkward conversation.
The best way to do this that I have found so far is to assume rapport. This means that you simply pretend that you are meeting one of your best friends. Then you start the interaction in that frame of mind instead of the nervous one.
This works surprisingly well. You can read more about it in How to Have Less Awkward Conversations: Assuming Rapport.
9. Use your reticular activation system to your advantage.
I learned about the organs and the inner workings of the body in class but nobody told me about the reticular activation system. And that’s a shame, because this is one of the most powerful things you can learn about. What this focus system, this R.A.S, in your mind does is to allow you to see in your surroundings what you focus your thoughts on. It pretty much always helps you to find what you are looking for.
So you really need to focus on what you want, not on what you don’t want. And keep that focus steady.
Setting goals and reviewing them frequently is one way to keep your focus on what’s important and to help you take action that will move your closer to toward where you want to go. Another way is just to use external reminders such as pieces of paper where you can, for instance, write down a few things from this post like “Give value” or “Assume rapport”. And then you can put those pieces of paper on your fridge, bathroom mirror etc.
10. Your attitude changes your reality.
We have all heard that you should keep a positive attitude or perhaps that “you need to change your attitude!”. That is a nice piece of advice I suppose, but without any more reasons to do it is very easy to just brush such suggestions off and continue using your old attitude.
But the thing that I’ve discovered the last few years is that if you change your attitude, you actually change your reality. When you for instance use a positive attitude instead of a negative one you start to see things and viewpoints that were invisible to you before. You may think to yourself “why haven’t I thought about things this way before?”.
When you change your attitude you change what you focus on. And all things in your world can now be seen in a different light.
This is of course very similar to the previous tip but I wanted to give this one some space. Because changing your attitude can create an insane change in your world. It might not look like it if you just think about it though. Pessimism might seem like realism. But that is mostly because your R.A.S is tuned into seeing all the negative things you want to see. And that makes you “right” a lot of the time. And perhaps that is what you want. On the other hand, there are more fun things than being right all the time.
If you try changing your attitude for real – instead of analysing such a concept in your mind – you’ll be surprised.
You may want to read more about this topic in Take the Positivity Challenge!
11. Gratitude is a simple way to make yourself feel happy.
Sure, I was probably told that I should be grateful. Perhaps because it was the right thing to do or just something I should do. But if someone had said that feeling grateful about things for minute or two is a great way to turn a negative mood into a happy one I would probably have practiced gratitude more. It is also a good tool for keeping your attitude up and focusing on the right things. And to make other people happy. Which tends to make you even happier, since emotions are contagious.
12. Don’t compare yourself to others.
The ego wants to compare. It wants to find reasons for you to feel good about yourself (“I’ve got a new bike!”). But by doing that it also becomes very hard to not compare yourself to others who have more than you (“Oh no, Bill has bought an even nicer bike!”). And so you don’t feel so good about yourself once again. If you compare yourself to others you let the world around control how you feel about yourself. It always becomes a roller coaster of emotions.
A more useful way is to compare yourself to yourself. To look at how far you have come, what you have accomplished and how you have grown. It may not sound like that much fun but in the long run it brings a lot more inner stillness, personal power and positive feelings.
13. 80-90% of what you fear will happen never really come into reality.
This is a big one. Most things you fear will happen never happen. They are just monsters in your own mind. And if they happen then they will most often not be as painful or bad as you expected. Worrying is most often just a waste of time.
This is of course easy to say. But if you remind yourself of how little of what you feared throughout your life that has actually happened you can start to release more and more of that worry from your thoughts.
14. Don’t take things too seriously.
It’s very easy to get wrapped up in things. But most of the things you worry about never come into reality. And what may seem like a big problem right now you may not even remember in three years.
Taking yourself, your thoughts and your emotions too seriously often just seems to lead to more unnecessary suffering. So relax a little more and lighten up a bit. It can do wonders for your mood and as an extension of that; your life.
15. Write everything down.
If your memory is anything like mine then it’s like a leaking bucket. Many of your good or great ideas may be lost forever if you don’t make a habit of writing things down. This is also a good way to keep your focus on what you want. Read more about it in Why You Should Write Things Down.
16. There are opportunities in just about every experience.
In pretty much any experience there are always things that you can learn from it and things within the experience that can help you to grow. Negative experiences, mistakes and failure can sometimes be even better than a success because it teaches you something totally new, something that another success could never teach you.
Whenever you have a “negative experience” ask yourself: where is the opportunity in this? What is good about this situation? One negative experience can – with time – help you create many very positive experiences.
What do you wish someone had told you in school or you had just learned earlier in life?
Being able to eliminate bad habits can have a profound effect on your life. But habits can be challenging to change since they aren’t based on thoughtful choice, so it’s difficult to use logic to change your behavior. They require a multi-facet approach.
If you can’t shake your bad habits, try these tips to get you on the road to freedom:
1. Give it a month. In 30 days you can eliminate a bad habit and create a new, positive habit. Do your very best for a month. If you backslide after a month, it’s likely that your strategy is lacking.
2. Replace your bad habit. It’s almost impossible to just drop it and not replace what you’ve lost. So think about what your bad habit gives you and find a replacement that provides the same benefit. Replace the benefit or it will be a constant battle.
3. Deal with one challenge at a time. For example, avoid trying to overhaul your diet, exercise, spending, and smoking habits all at once. Pick one; give it a month. Then add another one once you’re used to not having the first bad habit.
You don’t have to be in a hurry. Consider what it would mean if you could just get rid of your 4 worst habits. That’s only 4 months away. Comparatively, that’s quick, considering that you’ve probably had them for a long time.
4. Be a scientist. Leave the big emotional struggle for someone else and approach the process like a scientist. Have an attitude of wondering if you can replace the habit. Hypothesize on how it might turn out. Be curious and have a perspective of doing an experiment. There’s less drama and bias that way.
5. Remove your triggers. For example, get the junk food out of the house. If you smoke, stay away from the places you always smoke. Avoid the places that tempt you to spend a lot of money. Habits don’t have a lot of thought behind them – they’re almost like reflexes. Don’t put yourself in harm’s way.
6. Avoid being too hard on yourself. It might take a couple of tries to get the new habit to stick. Just improve your approach and keep on going.
7. Remind yourself. It’s easy to forget to perform your new habit. If you’re going to start exercising every day, set up some reminders. If you’re going to floss, leave the floss out where you can see it.
8. Tell your friends. Your friends can help you reach your goal. They’ll say something if they see you eating a hot fudge sundae or smoking on your lunch breaks. Get all the help you can.
9. Be consistent. If you’re going to start exercising regularly, try to do it each day at the same time. This is much easier than trying to exercise 3 times a week. Try to do your replacement habit daily.
10. Remember the pain. Each day, ask yourself what it will mean if you don’t stop indulging in your bad habit. Visualize the likely outcome.
11. Focus on the pleasure. Every day, ask yourself what it will mean if you eliminate or replace your bad habit. Visualize the likely outcome of this scenario.
Bad habits really put the brakes on your progress.
Use the tips above and give yourself a great opportunity to eliminate your bad habits and replace them with useful habits. There’s no better feeling than knowing you have control over your life.
To Our Success,
All of us are looking forward to Monday, 4th of May to dash out to our business and other engagements. Please read this, digest and practice it:
We have to Change Our Way Of Life and Help ourselves by PRACTICING PERSONAL HYGIENE.
We Will Be Dealing With A Lot Of People. Danfo Drivers, Hawkers, Customers, Road users, Food Vendors, Marwa/Keke, Taxi and Bike Men etc. We Won’t Know Who Has The Virus. Hence, We Need PERSONAL HYGIENE.
Please let us be careful, try and avoid crowded places.
May God mercy help us 🙏🙏
Photo Credit: Sciencemag.org
If a dog was your teacher,these are some of the lessons you might learn…
When loved ones come home, always run to greet them
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride
Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face,to be pure ecstasy
When it’s in your best interest, practice obedience
Let others know when they’ve invaded your territory
Take naps and stretch before rising
Run romp and play daily
Thrive on attention and let people touch you
Avoid biting, when a simple growl will do
On warm days stop to lie on your back on the grass
On hot days drink lots of water and lay under a shady tree
When you’re happy dance around and wag your entire body
No matter how often you’re scolded,
don’t buy into the guilt thing and pout,
run right back and make friends
Delight in the simple joy of a long walk
Eat with gusto and enthusiasm
Stop when you have had enough
Never pretend to be something you’re not
If what you want lies buried,
dig until you find it
When someone is having a bad day,
…sit close by
…and nuzzle them gently.
When you wake up and see this, I want you to remember that you are a Nigerian in Nigeria. When your rent is due, your landlord will ask for his money whether you are in quarantine or not.
You do not have the luxury to Netflix and chill.
Netflix with sense. You are even paying money to watch the film. You pay rent on Netflix. What is your plan after covid 19? Come back and answer me
You can post all the quotes that satisfy your laziness or massage your ego. When you are done with quotes, you come and face real life. You better not be busy doing all the challenge online and forget to challenge yourself to come out of this phase better if not brand new. The real challenge is the one you give yourself, by yourself for yourself.
Stop comparing, focus on you. You do not have all the time.
I’m praying about it is not a solution dear. Faith without works is what? DEAD.
Pray ,plan and execute. Bills do not answer to prayer, they answer to money! Johnnymontage said it.
There are families who cannot afford to buy food. Some bought and right now, everything has finished. Hold on. Have you thought about the market after covid 19? The way things are right now? Some offices will owe salary for some months, some businesses will phase out, some will stall. What is your plan? When the excuse for staying indoors is taking away, what will be your reason for going out?
Life is balance. Right in your room or wherever you are quarantined, look for avenues to improve yourself. Work on YOU. Right where you are. I’m not going to narrow it down to you, it’s up to you to figure it out. Everything is vanity ba, tell your children when they are driven from school to sit at home. Tell them when there is nothing to eat to sleep that food is vanity. Tell your debtor to forget the money that it is vanity. You are a Nigerian in Nigeria. What you cast and bind for, other countries get for free.
HELP YOURSELF. EVOLVE.
With this 7 lessons you will find answer to this questions.
What is good life? What is happiness? What is success? What is pleasure? How should I treat other people? How should I cope with unfortunate events? How can I get rid off unnecessary worry? How should I handle liberty?
1. Examine life, engage life with vengeance; always search for new pleasures and new destines to reach with your mind. This rule isn’t new. It echoes the verses of ancient Greek philosophers and most notably those of Plato through the voice of his hero, Socrates. Living life is about examining life through reason, nature’s greatest gift to humanity. The importance of reason in sensing and examining life is evident in all phases of life– from the infant who strains to explore its new surroundings to the grandparent who actively reads and assesses the headlines of the daily paper. Reason lets human beings participate in life, to be human is to think, appraise, and explore the world, discovering new sources of material and spiritual pleasure
2. Worry only about the things that are in your control, the things that can be influenced and changed by your actions, not about the things that are beyond your capacity to direct or alter. This rule summarizes several important features of ancient Stoic wisdom — features that remain powerfully suggestive for modern times. Most notably the belief in an ultimately rational order operating in the universe reflecting a benign providence that ensures proper outcomes in life. Thinkers such as Epictetus did not simply prescribe “faith” as an abstract philosophical principle; they offered a concrete strategy based on intellectual and spiritual discipline. The key to resisting the hardship and discord that intrude upon every human life, is to cultivate a certain attitude toward adversity based on the critical distinction between those things we are able to control versus those which are beyond our capacity to manage. The misguided investor may not be able to recover his fortune but he can resist the tendency to engage in self-torment. The victims of a natural disaster, a major illness or an accident may not be able to recover and live their lives the way they used to, but they too can save themselves the self-torment. In other words, while we cannot control all of the outcomes we seek in life, we certainly can control our responses to these outcomes and herein lies our potential for a life that is both happy and fulfilled.
3. Treasure Friendship, the reciprocal attachment that fills the need for affiliation. Friendship cannot be acquired in the market place, but must be nurtured and treasured in relations imbued with trust and amity. According to Greek philosophy, one of the defining characteristics of humanity that distinguishes it from other forms of existence is a deeply engrained social instinct, the need for association and affiliation with others, a need for friendship. Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle viewed the formation of society as a reflection of the profound need for human affiliation rather than simply a contractual arrangement between otherwise detached individuals. Gods and animals do not have this kind of need but for humans it is an indispensable aspect of the life worth living because one cannot speak of a completed human identity, or of true happiness, without the associative bonds called “friendship.” No amount of wealth, status, or power can adequately compensate for a life devoid of genuine friends.
4. Experience True Pleasure. Avoid shallow and transient pleasures. Keep your life simple. Seek calming pleasures that contribute to peace of mind. True pleasure is disciplined and restrained. In its many shapes and forms, pleasure is what every human being is after. It is the chief good of life. Yet not all pleasures are alike. Some pleasures are kinetic—shallow, and transient, fading way as soon as the act that creates the pleasure ends. Often they are succeeded by a feeling of emptiness and psychological pain and suffering. Other pleasures arecatastematic—deep, and prolonged, and continue even after the act that creates them ends; and it is these pleasures that secure the well-lived life. That’s the message of the Epicurean philosophers that have been maligned and misunderstood for centuries, particularly in the modern era where their theories of the good life have been confused with doctrines advocating gross hedonism.
5. Master Yourself. Resist any external force that might delimit thought and action; stop deceiving yourself, believing only what is personally useful and convenient; complete liberty necessitates a struggle within, a battle to subdue negative psychological and spiritual forces that preclude a healthy existence; self mastery requires ruthless cador. One of the more concrete ties between ancient and modern times is the idea that personal freedom is a highly desirable state and one of life’s great blessings. Today, freedom tends to be associated, above all, with political liberty. Therefore, freedom is often perceived as a reward for political struggle, measured in terms of one’s ability to exercise individual “rights.”
The ancients argued long before Sigmund Freud and the advent of modern psychology that the acquisition of genuine freedom involved a dual battle. First, a battle without, against any external force that might delimit thought and action. Second, a battle within, a struggle to subdue psychological and spiritual forces that preclude a healthy self-reliance. The ancient wisdom clearly recognized that humankind has an infinite capacity for self-deception, to believe what is personally useful and convenient at the expense of truth and reality, all with catastrophic consequences. Individual investors often deceive themselves by holding on to shady stocks, believing what they want to believe. They often end up blaming stock analysts and stockbrokers when the truth of the matter is they are the ones who eventually made the decision to buy them in the first place. Students also deceive themselves believing that they can pass a course without studying, and end up blaming their professors for their eventual failure. Patients also deceive themselves that they can be cured with convenient “alternative medicines,” which do not involve the restrictive lifestyle of conventional methods.
6. Avoid Excess. Live life in harmony and balance. Avoid excesses. Even good things, pursued or attained without moderation, can become a source of misery and suffering. This rule is echoed in the writings of ancient Greek thinkers who viewed moderation as nothing less than a solution to life’s riddle. The idea of avoiding the many opportunities for excess was a prime ingredient in a life properly lived, as summarized in Solon’s prescription “Nothing in Excess” (6th Century B.C.). The Greeks fully grasped the high costs of passionate excess. They correctly understood that when people violate the limits of a reasonable mean, they pay penalties ranging from countervailing frustrations to utter catastrophe. It is for this reason that they prized ideals such as measure, balance, harmony, and proportion as much as they did, the parameters within which productive living can proceed. If, however, excess is allowed to destroy harmony and balance, then the life worth living becomes impossible to obtain.
7. Be a Responsible Human Being. Approach yourself with honesty and thoroughness; maintain a kind of spiritual hygiene; stop the blame-shifting for your errors and shortcomings. Be honest with yourself and be prepared to assume responsibility and accept consequences. This rule comes from Pythagoras, the famous mathematician and mystic, and has special relevance for all of us because of the common human tendency to reject responsibility for wrongdoing. Very few individuals are willing to hold themselves accountable for the errors and mishaps that inevitably occur in life. Instead, they tend to foist these situations off on others complaining of circumstances “beyond their control.” There are, of course, situations that occasionally sweep us along, against which we have little or no recourse. But the far more typical tendency is to find ourselves in dilemmas of our own creation — dilemmas for which we refuse to be held accountable. How many times does the average person say something like, “It really wasn’t my fault. If only John or Mary had acted differently then I would not have responded as I did.” Cop-outs like these are the standard reaction for most people. They reflect an infinite human capacity for rationalization, finger-pointing, and denial of responsibility. Unfortunately, this penchant for excuses and self-exemption has negative consequences. People who feed themselves a steady diet of exonerating fiction are in danger of living life in bad faith — more, they risk corrupting their very essence as a human being.
Hope your motivated by this.
(1) Never think or speak negatively about yourself; that
puts you in disagreement with God.
(2) Meditate on your God-given strengths and learn to
encourage yourself, for much of the time nobody else will.
(3) Don’t compare yourself to anybody else. You’re unique,
one of a kind, an original. So don’t settle for being a copy.
(4) Focus on your potential, not your limitations.
Remember, God lives in you!
(5) Find what you like to do, do well, and strive to do it
(6) Have the courage to be different. Be a God pleasure,
not a people pleasure .
(7) Learn to handle criticism. Let it develop you instead of
(8) Determine your own worth instead of letting others do
it for you. They’ll short-change you!
(9) Keep your shortcomings in perspective – you’re still a
work in progress.
(10) Focus daily on your greatest source of confidence –
the God Who lives in you .. !!
Take time to understand someone’s truth, before forming your own opinion, Know their story before you gossip about their name, Know their path, before you criticize their walk.
You don’t know how far they have come, nor what they have been through, so stop judging them like you do. Their lives may not be perfect, but their lives sure and indeed is worth it.
Someone can face the same situation as you and handle it completely differently; Someone can go through the same situation as you went through and come out differently.
Your molehill could be someone else’s mountain, so don’t judge their process, rather encourage them, pray for them, support them.
Just because their road seem rocky doesn’t mean it won’t lead them to a beautiful place! Just because they made a few mistakes in the past doesn’t mean they can’t eventually get it right.
Everyone has a struggle; Just because someone else’s struggle is more public than yours doesn’t make you a better person, You probably just hide yours well.
Its time to Focus on “you” and ask yourself Is your life actually better? Are you making the desired progress in your daily walk? We often focus on other peoples flaws that we fail to see ours; Your life can actually be better if you choose to focus your effort on you rather than spotlighting other peoples flaws; You can’t become who you want to be by remaining who you are; It’s time to stop acting like you are perfect and start making your life better! You can’t change your tomorrow’s by having your today’s look like your yesterday’s.
So before you criticize others, don’t forget to check the mirror. It’s a great place to start passing judgement; #smiles
According to European Centre for Disease prevention and control definition of social distancing,
“It refers to efforts that aim, through a variety of means, to decrease or interrupt transmission of covid19 in a population (sub-)group by minimizing physical contact between potentially infected individuals and healthy individuals, or between population groups with high rates of transmission and population groups with no or low level of transmission.”
Knowing the certainty on the ground, it is inquisitive that WHO and ministries of health in different African countries are recommending social distance and self-quarantine (self isolation) as a way of reducing the spread of the corona virus. Africa can’t employ the idea of social distancing and total lock down such times to curb covid19.
Lots of South African youth are trapped in poverty from early age. 43.5% of the citizens under the age of 17 live in households that earned below middle income ($60) per month. France 24 said “ Its hard to maintain social distancing in Cameroon.”
Looking at how people shared accommodation, slums and informal settlement are also part of the physical infrastructure of many African cities/town. They live in overcrowded area and lack basic social amenities and other essential services even before the threat of global health crisis emerged (covid19 pandemic).
Thinking of it, Johannesburg in South Africa, has about 700,000 people who are estimated to be living in less than 5 square kilometers (1.9 square miles) and Makoko in Lagos state Nigeria has over 300,000 whose homes are built on stilts in a lagoon. Not only are these overcrowded, but also they commute and queue to use social amenities and spend significant amount of time together, which could potentially expose more people to the virus. Change is constant but is difficult to change in such environment.
Working from home is not part of Africa, but those that work in big offices can change to work from home. If your only means of livelihood is to sell tomato or second-hand clothe (popularly known as Okrika in Nigeria) at an informal market in a big city or a town, how do you begin to do this online work from home thing.
The choice before you is often to stay home and fail to provide evening meal for your family. If I was that person selling at a market, I know the choice I would make. It is not staying at home or maintaining any social distance.
World Health Organization (WHO) also recommended self-quarantine for those who are concerned about the risk of exposure. In adhering to self-quarantine, it included not shearing bathroom, living space and even bedroom (Another form of distancing). If they can, in a house like mine where the bedroom doubles as kitchen and living space all shared with family and sometimes extended family, how do I practice self-quarantine?
WHO recommendation is so absurd if your community borehole or toilet is one shared by dozens of people. This is so unfortunate for many of people living in such reality. Even our health system support queuing to get health-care services. In Sunyani Regional hospital in Ghana, the chairs available are not enough to enable patients and visitor to sit and wait for their turn to be attended to… Even with proper education, Africans are used to close contacting through the act of shaking and hugging, all as part of their culture. Social distancing is not for Africa.
Social distance could probably work for other western world but this is just a privilege to few Africans. Though WHO has done great work for the recommendation but they need to look at Africa differently. Social distancing is easily said than done.
I will suggest, in handling shared accommodation, government should provide tents and mattress to space people who are living in a congested are. In handling queuing for services, security forces must be deployed by government to ensure proper chair spacing. France is using police force for this. Government should force all landlords/landladies to create or provide adequate washrooms for their tenants, so that washroom sharing will be minimal.
In conclusion, the question still stands, “what should African countries that have this kind of settlement do in this era of corona virus pandemic? “
This is my take home on that question.
I saw this by Council of _Psychologists and I will want to share with the world.
Be your very best always.
The new Coronavirus may not show sign of infection for many days. How can one know if he/she is infected? By the time they have fever and/or cough and go to the hospital, the lung is usually 50% Fibrosis and it’s too late.
Experts provide a simple self-check that we can do every morning.
Take a deep breath and hold your breath for more than 10 seconds. If you complete it successfully without coughing, without discomfort, stiffness or tightness, etc., it proves there is no Fibrosis in the lungs, basically indicates no infection.
In critical time, please self-check every morning in an environment with clean air.
Everyone should ensure your mouth & throat are moist, never dry.
Take a few sips of water every 15 minutes at least. Why? Even if the virus gets into your mouth, drinking water or other liquids will wash them down through your throat and into the stomach. Once there, your stomach acid will kill all the virus. If you don’t drink enough water more regularly, the virus can enter your windpipe and into the lungs. That’s very dangerous.
Please send and share this with family and friends. Take care everyone may Almighty God
help us all and let us live long in peace.
I loved this image for a couple of reasons. The acronyms are sheer genius, but second and even more important – it reinforces and recognizes the choice we always have and the power we ALWAYS have. How we handle fear will determine who we are. Fear will determine the relationships you do or do not have, the places you go or don’t go, what you can and can’t handle, what you say yes or no to, your ability to seize opportunities and your able to learn, do, try and become something new. POWERFUL STUFF!!
Make fear your friend. Make fear the best thing to ever happen to you.
Make fear put you on a path of achievement and power.
Make your ability to ‘rise above’ fear, the foundation for your confidence, self esteem and self image.
And always remember that FEAR is nothing more than False Evidence Appearing Real!
Don’t let fear shrink you, LIVE LARGE. LIVE WITH HOPE, BELIEF, PATIENCE AND TOLERANCE!
What is fear to you?
HOW TO LOCATE ALL THE NYSC ORIENTATION CAMPS FOR 2020 BATCH A ORIENTATION EXERCISE
Emancipation “the fact or process of being set free from legal, social, or political restrictions; liberation.”
Today people value sexy breasts and nipples or six packs over brains and principles. And that’s why more Nigerians prefer to watched Big Brother Nigeria than CNN or documentaries. How did we get here? We got here by thinking entertainment is valuable (please don’t get me wrong, entertainment has its place in our life).
That’s why more Nigerian pay for VVIP for a comedy show and think that a seminar, workshops but say book is too expensive.
Most single ladies wants a sound and responsible guy, yet all she has is a wardrobe of designer clothes, but no library or a book of her own, and the gentlemen the same.
Asked many students when was the last time they read a book, and they will say “during examination”.
They can buy the latest phone or gadgets different types of hairs, clothes, jewelries…. But when it comes to EMPOWERING themselves, they will say price is too high or I don’t this now.
No matter what you have, you are what you value the most.
I challenge you to emancipate yourself, invest in empowering your self and your mind. Invest in books, seminars and workshops, build networks.
Trust me, there’s a huge potential here, even in a growing country of over 160 million people managed by mediocre and leaders of nuisance value, if ONLY you and your team can stand out, we can go further ahead as we’re building minds, businesses, people and brands.
The revolution is here and now but not by guns or protest or violence but in self liberation.
There was once a man who was ship-wrecked and stranded on an island. Every day he prayed asking God to send someone to rescue him, but to his disappointment, no one ever came.
Months passed and this man learned how to survive on the island. During this time, he accumulated things from the island and stored them in a hut that he constructed. One day after hunting for food and returning back to his hut, much to his dismay he saw that his hut was on fire along with everything else he owned!
All of his possessions were going up in smoke! The only thing he had left were the clothes on his back. Initially he was in shock, and then he was consumed with anger and rage!
In his fury he threw a fist into the air and began cursing God and yelling, “God, how could you let this happen to me? I’ve been praying everyday for months about being rescued and no one has come, and now everything that I have is on fire! How could you do to this to me! Why did you let this happen?”
Later the man was on his hands and knees weeping heavily when he happened to look up and catch sight of a ship coming in his direction. The man was rescued and as they were heading back to civilization the man asked the captain, “How were you able to find me?”
The captain responded, “We were voyaging across the ocean when we noticed on the horizon a column of smoke going up. We decided to go check it out and when we did, that’s when we found you!”
Moral Lesson- In life we are going to be confronted with challenges, problems, and disasters. But keep in mind that what the devil has meant for bad, God can transform into your good! What is a catastrophe can sometimes be a blessing in disguise. “The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.”
29th February is a very special day, apart from been a leap day of the leap year its a day in which I was born.
Today am 32 years old, looking back at the years past I am greatful to all the mistakes and the right things I’ve done.
I am glad I’ve made some mistakes in life it has helped me to be a better person.
The right choices I’ve made has proven that right choice are always the best decision.
I want to thank God for all the people that have helped me become better, those that toked advantage of me.
In all I’ve learned that life I dynamic and not static. Things wont always be as they are. Things don’t always appear as they seems.
Make the best of every situation of life.
Failure is not the opposite of success, it’s a stepping stone to success .
If you are not willing to fail, to learn and adapt along the way, you are not willing to be great
Ibrahim Gana Malgwi
Define who you want. You must not get to a point of desperation or forlornness as to be confused about who you want in terms of spiritual standing. Never give consideration to a man who has no relationship with God.
There are a few questions you should ask before saying ‘I want to do’ or ‘I do.’
1. Can you see yourself in the picture of the future of your intended spouse?
If you are unsure of his future, be careful before you dabble into it.
How do you peep into his future? You do that by looking at his vision and passion now. His vision is indicated in his aspirations and his passion is indicated in his present
2. Do you love enough?
How do you know if you love him?
A. Do you respect him or her?
His or her body, interest, parents, ideas? Or is he just interested in sex? Is it really about your person or just about your body? Those are two different things.
B. Do you give to him or her?
Or are you just receiving? Are you interested in giving or just grabbing?
C. How do his family, friends and associates treat you?
Are you welcome or treated with disdain? There is no point staying where you are not valued or celebrated.
D. Is he a representation of 1Cor.13:4-7?
He may not be able to fulfill all of it, but in the least, those verses should be his or her guiding principles.
Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have. Love doesn’t strut, Doesn’t have a swelled head, Doesn’t force itself on others, Isn’t always “me first,’ Doesn’t fly off the handle, Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others, Doesn’t revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end. Love never dies. (1Co 13:4-8 MSG)
3. Are you proud of him or her?
Are you proud of him or her physically? How do you feel when both of you walk down the road? Do you feel proud, honoured and confident? Or do you feel embarrassed and ashamed of his or her person and presence?
Are you proud of his cognitive abilities? Do you feel embarrassed when he or she talks in the public?
Are you proud of his or her spiritual life? Or are you filled with fear, anxiety and trepidation at his spiritual ineptitude?
4. Is it time? Is it the right time?
To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: (Ecc 3:1 KJV)
For everything there is a fixed time, and a time for every business under the sun. (Eccl 3:1 BBE)
There’s an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:
(Eccl 3:1 MSG)
5. Is he or she accountable to any spiritual authority?
Accountability to spiritual authority means your intended spouse understands the place of wisdom and counsel. Accountability reduces his or her chances of dumping you. Is he or she submissive to authority or just an island to himself? It is risky to get involved with spiritually rebellious people because he or she will drag you into the rebellion and the consequences are debilitating.
6. Is the feeling mutual?
Does he really want you or he just wants a sex toy? Does he want you or your body? That he is coming after you or giving you attention does not mean he or she loves you. You set out and went out to buy a chicken. Do you love the chicken? No. It’s going to end up in the pot. Does he love you or he just wants you to end up on his bed? Marriage is like a bird, it takes two wings to fly.
7. Is God in it?
Is there peace? A home without God is a hostel. Any investment in a relationship not founded on God’s principles is a waste.
Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.
(Psa 127:1 KJV)
If GOD doesn’t build the house, the builders only build shacks. If GOD doesn’t guard the city, the night watchman might as well nap.
(Psa 127:1 MSG)
For those already married, you will find out he or she is not always perfect. Rather than get frustrated with his or her weaknesses leading to several quarrels, take it to God in prayer who has the heart of Kings in his hand s and can turn it whichever way he wants!
Find out what God says. It is every important!
I pray for you this morning that God will guide you, lead you and give you specific direction concerning your relationship and marriage. You will not miss it in Jesus name. You will be not distracted. As you stay in God’s word, light will dawn on your soul to destroy every confusing spirits in Jesus name.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I will not be misled. I have the Spirit of God. I am led by the Spirit of God to choose rightly.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY
Lord, help me to have a discerning heart, to choose rightly and wisely in Jesus Name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Rom 8:14 KJV
(14) For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Think deeply on “Who do I want as a Spouse’
Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.
She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”
She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.”
Remember to put the glass down.
‘Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God’ Phlp 4:6 (NIV)
Please Share —
Personal development is a fascinating and fun journey… most of the time.
Sometimes you become aware of aspects of yourself that you don’t like. These are usually the things that need the most attention. If you find yourself denying or dismissing some part of you that you KNOW needs changing but you’re resisting it, it may help to read some personal development quotes to keep you motivated. After all, the work you put into yourself is for your benefit!
Personal Development Quotes
1. “When you want something,all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”- Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist
2. “As soon as you stop making everyone else responsible for your happiness, the happier you’ll be.” – Nina Guilbeau
3. “The word ‘listen’ has the same letters as the word ‘silent’” – Alfred Brendel
4. “It is more Important to be of pure intention than of perfect action.” – Ilyas Kassam
5. “Even in the most peaceful surroundings, the angry heart finds quarrel. Even in the most quarrelsome surroundings, the grateful heart finds peace.” – Doe Zantamata
6. “Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.” – Marcus Aurelius
7. “Life was meant to be lived, and curiosity must be kept alive. One must never, for whatever reason, turn his back on life.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
8. “If there is no wind, row.” – Latin proverb
9. “You are the way you are because that’s the way you want to be. If you really wanted to be different, you would be in the process of changing right now.”– Fred Smith
10. “The mind maketh good or ill, wretch or happy, rich or poor.” – Edmund Spenser
11. “What a folly the thought of throwing away life at once, and yet have no regard to throwing it away by parcels and piecemeal.” – John Hove
12. “People do not attract that which they want, but that which they are.”– James Allen
13. “What you subconsciously want, you will get. And what you subconsciously do not want, you will avoid.” – Bo Sanchez
14. “Things do not change; we change.” – Henry David Thoreau
15. “Meditation is the soul’s perspective glass.” – Owen Feltham
16. “What comes, is called.” – Ki Longfellow
17. “All things are possible to him who believes.” – Jesus [Mark 9:23]
18. “The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.” – E.E. Cummings
19. “The things that we love tell us what we are.” – St. Thomas Aquinas
20. “Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.” – Don Marquis
21. “When you plant a seed of love, it is you that blossoms.” – Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati
22. “Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.” – Helen Keller
23. “To experience peace does not mean that your life is always blissful. It means that you are capable of tapping into a blissful state of mind amidst the normal chaos of a hectic life.” – Jill Bolte Taylor
24. “If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but your own estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.” – Marcus Aurelius
25. “To love what you do and feel that it matters – how could anything be more fun?” – Katherine Graham
26. “Learn how to fail intelligently, for failing is one of the greatest arts in the world.” – Charles Kettering
27. “Often people attempt to live their lives backwards; they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want, so they will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want.” – Margaret Young
28. “I’ve never been poor, only broke. Being poor is a frame of mind. Being broke is a temporary condition.” – Mike Todd
29. “Have you ever noticed that when there is a problem, you are always there? The problem is yours – both in perception and in responsibility. Clear the beliefs in you that see it as a problem, and the problem disappears!” – Dr. Hew Len
30. “Don’t look where you fell. Look where you slipped.” – Unknown
31. “The secret to my success is that I bit off more than I could chew and I chewed as fast as I could.” – Paul Hogan
32. “When we give ourselves permission to fail, we at the same time give ourselves permission to excel.” – Eloise Ristad
33. “If it’s still in your mind, it’s worth taking the risk.” – Paulo Coelho
34. “The bolder the action, the greater the genius, magic and power that is likely to flow from it.” – Robert Ringer
35. “An idea not coupled with action will never get any bigger than the brain cell it occupies.” – Arnold Glasgow
36. “You either move toward something you love or away from something you fear. The first expands, the second constricts.” – Tom Crum
37. “Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.” – Raymond Lindquist
38. “Discontent is the first necessity of progress.” – Thomas Edison
39. “You will become as small as your controlling desire, as great as your dominant
aspiration.” – James Allen
40. “You can’t cross a sea by merely staring into the water.” – Rabindranath Tagore
Develop yourself at every opportunity.
Sexiness don’t mean jack snot. Not in the grand scheme of things. Visually appealing, yes. But I can’t eat sexiness. Sexiness won’t help pay these bills or pay off our student loans. Sexiness won’t qualify for a mortgage, or get people to respect you, sexiness wont allow me set my next big business move.
Sexiness won’t help me raise these kids. Neither will it teach my daughters their true worth and value in this world.
We got way too many ‘Sexy’ sisters out here with nothing else to bring to the table. Sexiness is the totality of their package. And that’s WACK!
Most black men looking for a relationship want a USEFUL woman. Visual appeal alone won’t cut it. Besides: there are so many black women competing to be the sexiest, it’s not even a race worth entering.
Can you cook? Do you clean? Do you have mothering skills Do you love your father? Respect him? Respect other black men in general? Have you divested yourself of prior relationship baggage? Can you hold a conversation about REAL world events? And no: Love and Hip Hop doesn’t count!
Do you have a REAL relationship with a REAL God: or do you follow the fake one many Christians have invented for themselves because he’s more tolerable than the actual Truth?
These are the kind of questions discerning men are asking nowadays.
So if sexiness is all you bring to the table, you can keep it. I’d rather have a woman of pure unadulterated SUBSTANCE. And I’m sure I speak for most conscious-thinking brothers out there on this one.
There’s a new breed of black men out there ladies. And we ain’t settling for second best or taking any shorts. Either come correct or go get with the jacks and harries. That’s all many of you are use to dealing with anyway…
I saw this lovely post and I will love to share with you.
We live in a dissatisfied generation. Those who are short in height wished they were taller. The white is tanning their bodies trying to get dark, the blacks are bleaching trying to get white. The young are tinting their hair white, the old are dyeing their hair black. Singles are posing with wedding ring, those married forget to wear it, those with beards are shaving off, those with none are using methylated spirit to grow some!
Today, I have a story to tell. Are you ready for it? Here we go. Once upon a time, (time – time), when I was single, I looked forward to
marriage. Now that I am married, I missed the time I was single! End of story!
Singles will hardly believe that because all in their mind is to get married so that everything can change. I have been happily married for fourteen years and here are a few things I have learned that might bless you if you are still single.
1. Marriage will not make you happier. Be happy before marriage. Marriage has no power in itself beyond the two people involved.
2. Marriage will not change you. Change begins inwardly. Marriage is not a change agent. Marriage will not improve your attitudes, it will expose them. Marriage does not eliminate your weaknesses, it will amplify them. Start working on your attitudes and weaknesses before marriage.
3. Marriage will not cure loneliness. There are several married people who have their spouses with them by the second, but are extremely lonely. Loneliness is more of a state of mind than availability of people around you. The loneliest people in the world are sometimes the ones with large number of fans and crowd around them. Only God’s word can cure the root cause of loneliness.
4. Marriage will not take pressures away, it will probably bring more. You have one more life to manage. If you cannot manage yours and you venture into marriage, it will be a disaster. When the children start coming, there will be more pressures. Learn to take pressures head on by casting your care on Jesus and refusing to worry like the scripture advises.
5. Marriage is not all about sex. Ask somebody who is married. Yes, sex is a marital glue, a healing balm in the soul for couples, and a blessing that keeps couples together. But it is not like you think, sex in the morning, afternoon and evening. Average couples actually make love twice or thrice in a week. However, the more frequent it is for married couples, the better for them.
6. Your spouse will not be a magician neither is he the Holy Spirit. He will be a human being with his own issues. You will always need God. He might be very anointed on the pulpit and filled with God’s glory while she is ministering in the choir, but at home he or she is a human being with all the weaknesses complete. Learn to separate the office or position of your spouse from his or her person at home.
7. Marriage is not all about kisses, flowers, cinemas, cakes, chocolates and vacations alone. It is about cooking, pampers, crying baby, working, paying school fees and so on. It is about budgets, plans, strategies and divine wisdom. It is about submission to your husband who you sometimes think is hard, insensitive and unloving. It is about loving your wife who you sometimes think is stubborn, does not want to be corrected and can nag from morning till next day.
Photo Credit: imgur.com
No matter how thin you slice it, there will always be two sides! Don’t focus on being right, focus on making it work!
Remember to work for peace.
Photo Credit: phys.org
THE STORY OF A MOUSETRAP!
(Benefit of Cooperation)
A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package. What food might this contain? The mouse wondered – he was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap.
Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning:
“There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!”
The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, “Mr.Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be bothered by it.”
The mouse turned to the pig and told him, “There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!”
The pig sympathized, but said, I am so sorry, “Mr.Mouse , but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. Be assured you are in my prayers.”
The mouse turned to the cow and said “There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!”
The cow said, “Wow, Mr. Mouse. I’m sorry for you, but it’s no skin off my nose.”
So, the mouse returned to the house, head down and dejected, to face the farmer’s mousetrap alone.
That very night a sound was heard throughout the house — like the sound of a mousetrap catching its prey. The farmer’s wife rushed to see what was caught. In the darkness, she did not see it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught. The snake bit the farmer’s wife. The farmer rushed her to the hospital, and she returned home with a fever.
Everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup’s main ingredient.
But his wife’s sickness continued, so friends and neighbors came to sit with her around the clock. To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig.
The farmer’s wife did not get well; in fact, she died.
So many people came for her funeral; the farmer had the cow slaughtered to provide enough meat for all of them.
The mouse looked upon it all from his crack in the wall with great sadness.
So, the next time you hear someone is facing a problem and think it doesn’t concern you, remember — when one of us is threatened,we are all at risk.
We are all together involved in this journey called life, so it’s expedient we learn to cooperate with one another. We must keep an eye out for one another and make an extra effort to encourage one another.
HAVE A WONDERFUL WEEK!
Top 5 Words to Delete from Your Vocabulary
Let’s get straight to it.
Our actions create our life… Agree? Our thoughts create our actions…. Agree? Our thoughts are communicated to us in the form of language…. Agree? So…how can we live our largest, most expressive and most loving life if we are using vocabulary that makes us smaller, weaker and discouraged.
Do you know anybody, maybe even yourself, who loves to use phrases like: “This only happens to me”, “Life’s a b*tch“, “I caaaaaaaaan’t!”, “Never!”, “I just can’t win”, “I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t”.
The biggest problem with these phrases is not that they are negative or self centered, it’s that they stop you from taking action. Phrases like this paralyze us and fool us into thinking that we have no power and no choice. Which is nonsense.
What if our words always made us and who ever we are talking to feel inspired, empowered and re-energized?
I’ve created a list of some of the top five words and phrases you might want to delete from your vocabulary. I also included some replacements!
1. I can’t
You’re right! If you say you can’t, it’s over. Just that simple. The door is closed and locked. However, maybe you’re right. Maybe at this moment you can’t run 3 miles at once, maybe you can’t complete the project in 3 hours, maybe you can’t immediately forgive someone. With that said, you must learn to. I must learn, I will learn, I’m preparing myself to…is a much more empowering phrase that will propel you to take action, take risks and grow.
There is no failure, only feedback – only results. You might not get the results you want, but don’t confuse that with failure. And, please don’t ever confuse yourself with your results. You are never a failure but you are always learning. I’m learning, is a much more empowering phrases that let’s you know you are aware of the current results and also shows that you are invested in figuring out a way to get the desired outcome. Learning produces growth, while believing in failure produces hopelessness and stress.
3. I’m overwhelmed
Give yourself more credit! You are stronger and more durable than you think. You are not overwhelmed…you are in high demand! Doesn’t that feel so much better. Your self, school, family, boss, business and friends all need a lot from you because you have so much to give – give it. Being in high demand develops character and also helps you learn to prioritize. You might be challenged, you might be put to the test, you might be busy, but you are way too strong to be overwhelmed!
Stop. Stop! Stop! Please stop building a case against yourself. Stop rationalizing your excuses, procrastination or lack of productivity. “I want to do this but…” “I have always wanted to_________ but…” Stop making it so easy to talk yourself out of action. If you didn’t do something you said you would, or didn’t do something that you wanted to – own it, adjust, and move on. Don’t make excuses or rationales with the word ‘but’ because as we know, when we tell ourselves the same thing over and over again…we start to believe it. Don’t talk yourself out of your highest life.
5. I hate
Hate – a negative emotions that distorts judgement, tenses muscles, shortens breathing and puts us in a weak state of mind. Let’s not overreact and let’s focus on the positive. Why HATE peanuts, liars and traffic when we can prefer almonds, honesty and freedom. I prefer, is clear way of saying what you like, dislike and expect. I prefer is also empowering and will always lead the conversation or experience in a positive direction.
Take control of your words, thoughts, actions and life!
“The limits of my language means the limits of my world.”
― Ludwig Wittgenstein
Photo Credit: marykay.com
“Individuals sometimes feel insignificant and doubt they can really make a difference in the world. Well, believe me, one person can.”
Mary Kay Ash
Photo Credit: ForbesBooks
ATTITUDE.. Its Awesome.. Must Read..
If A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Is equal to 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
Then H+A+R+D+W+O+R+K = 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 =98%
K+N+O+W+L+E+D+G+E = 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
L+O+V+E= 12+15+22+5= 54%
L+U+C+K = 12+21+3+11 = 47%
None of them makes 100% Then what makes 100% ????
Is it Money ? NO !!!
Leadership ? NO !!!
A+T+T+I+T+U+D+E = 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 =100%
Every problem has a solution, only if we perhaps change our“ATTITUDE”. It is OUR ATTITUDE towards Life and Work that makes OUR Life 100% Successful..
Women always complain of lack of commitment from men. Here are four mistakes we do that get in the way of our commitment they need from men.
Mistake #1: Focusing On Events, Not Feelings
We women are taught to believe that events, and the time we “put in,” MEAN SOMETHING to a man. If he’s introduced us to his family or friends at work we’re on cloud nine. We think of these as “milestones” moving us closer to commitment and marriage. And we couldn’t be more wrong.
Time means NOTHING to a man. Sometimes, being in a comfortable HOLDING PATTERN with us is EXACTLY what he has in mind! They spend time with us, but then they go and commit to someone else.
Unless we can get into our man’s heart, and let him into ours to create a deep emotional bond, we DOOM ourselves to a superficial level that will never lead to a lifelong commitment.
Mistake #2: Thinking Exclusive = Committed
…women focus on getting a man to be exclusive – but this is only a temporary state. Instead, you need to focus on getting him committed…
How many of you have been comfortable in a relationship, only to have the man you are with meet someone else, or tell you he’s “found someone who really gets me.” How can it be that a man who is exclusive with you can “fall for” someone else so easily? It’s because he was not committed to you.
Oftentimes, women focus on getting a man to be exclusive – but this is only a temporary state. Instead, you need to focus on getting him committed to you. When that happens, he’ll be exclusive AND won’t “fall for” another woman ever again!
Mistake #3: Talking About Your Relationship, Not Creating It
Often when women feel their man becoming distant, they decide to TALK to him about it. To ask how he’s feeling, why he’s acting this way, or where the relationship is going.
When you talk to a man about your relationship, you have the OPPOSITE effect on him than you intend. Though we often hear men say how much they hate how “emotional” women are – this is exactly the part they CRAVE. They are so stuck in their brains, so much of the time, that if we’re stuck in ours, they can’t connect to us.
Every time we TALK about the relationship, it feels to him like a laundry list of to do items instead of INSPIRING a man to want to be with us.
Mistake #4: You Panic… He Leaves
Because we know that “Lifelong-Commitment” is a frightening thing to a man, we’re often afraid to say or do anything that might scare him more.
It’s easy to get paralyzed by fear and anger and stop being ourselves. We stop being the fun, relaxed women who he originally fell for who made him great before.
Photo Credit: pngfly.com
I found this funny story about how one person action and in-action is directly affecting another person.
BOSS says to SECRETARY: For a week, we will be traveling abroad, so make arrangements.
SECRETARY makes a call to her Husband: For a week my boss and I will be going abroad, so look after yourself.
HUSBAND makes call to SECRET LOVER: My wife is going abroad for a week, so let’s spend the week together.
SECRET LOVER makes a call to a LITTLE BOY whom she is giving private lessons: I have to work for a week, so you need not come for class.
LITTLE BOY makes call to his grandfather: Grandpa, for a week, I don’t have classes because my teacher is busy. Let’s spend the week together.
Grandpa ( d BOSS ) makes a call to his SECRETARY: This week I am spending time with my grandson. We can’t attend the meeting any longer.
SECRETARY makes a call to her HUSBAND: My boss has some personal matters to attend to, so our trip is canceled.
HUSBAND makes a call to SECRET LOVER: We cannot spend this week together; my wife has canceled her trip.
SECRET LOVER makes a call to LITTLE BOY whom she is giving private lessons: This
week we will have classes as usual.
LITTLE BOY makes a call to his grandfather: Grandpa, my teacher said this week I
have to attend class. Sorry I can’t keep you company.
Grandpa makes a call to his secretary: Don’t worry, this week we will attend that meeting, so make arrangements.
MY QUESTION IS- WHO CONTROLS THIS CHAIN?
It is the reflection of our true self
Its roots are inward, but its fruit is outward
It is our best or our worst enemy
It is more honest & more consistent than our words
It is a future outlook based on past experiences
It draws people to us – or repels them
It is never content until it is expressed
It is the librarian of our past, the speaker of our present and the prophet of our future…….
………..THAT’S THE POWER OF ATTITUDE……………..
A father and a dad are not the same:
One can be a dad and not a father,
Or one can be a father and not bother
To earn through love the more endearing name.
Some find fatherhood a bit too tame,
Leaving all the details to the mother,
Or dumping the sweet burden on another
Man with just a passing twinge of shame.
You have been our dad so many years
That you’ve become the landscape that is home,
The mountain that we look to from afar.
No matter where we go we’re not alone,
For you remain within to still our fears
And be the word that tells us who we are
During a Commencement speech at a High School, the speaker talks to the students about 11 things they did not and will not learn in school. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world.
Life is not fair – get used to it!
The world won’t care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won’t be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.
If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.
Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.
If you mess up, it’s not your parents’ fault, so don’t whine about your mistakes; learn from them.
Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent’s generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.
Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they’ll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn’t bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.
Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time.
Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one
What you do every day is already important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. But today, I dare you to take it up a notch, pump some extra life into every hour, and really make your time count.
Today, I dare you to…
1. Make someone else smile.
Ordinary people worry today and postpone their happiness for tomorrow. Intelligent people are happy today and postpone their worries for tomorrow. Wise people only wish happiness for all, today and tomorrow. If you wish to have a lifetime of happiness, dedicate time every day to helping others smile with complete sincerity and enthusiasm.
2. Be imperfect.
Something that is really difficult, but totally worth it, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the journey of becoming your true self. The most beautiful part of this journey is simply returning to the peaceful feeling of being. This peace is the result of retraining your mind to process life as it is, rather than as you think it should be.
3. Make the best of what happens.
More important than what happens to you, is what you make of what happens to you. The more thankful you are, the more beautiful this world appears. You must uncover the good in the bad, the happy in your sad, the gain in your pain, and what makes you grateful not hateful.
4. Forgive your past self.
Sometimes, good people like you make bad choices. It doesn’t mean you’re bad; it means you’re human. So get bored with your past; it’s over. Forgive yourself for what you think you did or didn’t do, and focus on what you will do starting now.
5. Spend some time simply being and breathing.
The only way to live happily ever after is one day at a time. Just be, breathe, and think not about what you’re missing, but what you’ve been given. Happiness is something that comes into our lives gradually through the doors we don’t even remember leaving open.
6. Learn something new.
It’s important to remember that you cannot become who you are capable of being by remaining exactly where you are. If you are not willing to learn and grow, no one can help you. But if you are determined to learn and grow, no one can stop you. In the end, there are no permanent jobs on this planet; we are all interning here. Learn from everyone, evolve, remain humble, and don’t forget to have a good time.
7. Say “YES” to a spontaneous opportunity.
Everything in life can’t be planned. Some of the greatest opportunities will knock on your door when you least expect them to. Be flexible, be spontaneous, and just say “YES.”
Photo Credit: ecstaticintimacy.com
People may have disappointed you, betrayed your trust, hurt you badly, break your heart and even make you question yourself…..
But you must learn to accept the fact, that some people may never fully come to understand how much damage they may have caused you or others close to you by reason of their actions or inaction; as such you don’t have to stay damaged, hurt and in pain.
There are times when we must accept that people are exactly who we hoped they wouldn’t be…Yes I know, you may have been hurt so badly by their actions, Yes I know, that sometimes its not what happened that hurts the most, but rather its who did it that breaks you, but you still don’t have to stay broken.
The best revenge is being whole again. Its time to let go of the hurts and pain, its time to free your heart of the bitterness and anger you feel. Its time to be you all over again; Being hurt, offended or angry doesn’t give you an excuse to become the person you were not meant to be; You don’t have to let an emotion change your character..
You don’t have to be the person who keeps a grudge against someone else regardless of how much hurt they may have done; you got to be smart!!…. you got to learn to let go… Letting go is freeing your self from bitterness and pain, Letting go is choosing not to let the hurt define your character, Letting go is refusing to let the negativity steal your joy. Life is too short to be intentionally unhappy; Decide today to be happy, Decide today to free yourself from the hurts! Your life can be better!
written by Ibrahim Gana Malgwi
I saw this post a couple of years ago, and it challenged and help me with what I do. i will to share them with you as well. happy reading.
Ten steps from Michael
1. Take the first step immediately
Michael is a master at this. He really taught me how to think straightforward and just act on something. To give you an example, I was pitching him the idea and he asked me, “Yeah man that’ sounds cool. What would you call it? What would you want to call the product?” I was like, “Masters Blueprint.” He’s said, “Well that’s a cool name, let me see if that’s available.” He checked and he immediately registered the domain and set up a blog on it. It took him 5 minutes and it would have taken me 5 minutes as well but the difference is he just did it and I didn’t. I would’ve probably gone like, “Yeah man why don’t we think about the name a little bit more and make sure that it’s right for the product.” He just did it and I loved that about him because it was really easy to take my crazy perfectionist brain out of the game sometimes and it was truly necessary. I learned a lot through that and I aim to take the first step immediately.
2. Focus on your partner’s benefit and how solving your pain point will help you both.
The second lesson was especially important when I was pitching Michael because I approached him and said, “Yeah you know Michael you have this great knowledge, you have this proven system that works and you can replicate. A lot of people would be interested in it yet I know it also takes you a ton of time and it takes you a lot of effort to do it. That’s where I come in. I always wanted to create a product but never got myself to follow through.” I can create all of this for you and I think because I’m working with you and your reputation I will get myself to follow through. At the end it will help us your both because we will leverage your network but you don’t have to do a whole lot of work.
I think it was truly instrumental that I also put my pain point I there because if I was going to be, “Yeah man that’s so awesome for you. These are all the results you’d get.” Then at the same time he would be suspicious asking himself. “Why would you do that? Why are you offering this to me?” I also aim for always saying your pain point and how it will help you both because it will give them a reason to say yeah man I see why he’s approaching me. At the same time he’ll also know it will help people. Most people are really willing to help especially Michael.
3. Make an irresistible offer.
The next lesson I learned was to make an irresistible offer. Always think of the things that the people care most about. Michael cares most about his time because he already has enough money to fund his lifestyle. Make an irresistible offer that won’t take them a lot of effort to say yes to. Get rid of the objections. I said I was going to cover the production costs; I was going to fly over to your place and shoot it. You don’t have to come to me I’ll just chill out with you. All these things make it easy for him to say yes.
4. Be brutally honest and hold yourself to high standards.
I’m from Germany as I said and we have a very direct standard of approaching problems, so I really liked that he just said straight out, “I like this, the header is great. This cover sucks it doesn’t look very nice. I know what you can do; you do what you did with the other website that looked brilliant.” He held me to high standards and pushed me to do better, which really allowed me to give my best.
5. Don’t BS yourself! It may not be complex but it’s not always easy.
We all know this, yet I went into the project thinking I know web design, I know how to cut videos, I know how to shoot videos. I know all this stuff that we need to do so it’s going to be easy…
Then again even if you know all these things, it still is hard sometimes because there are days when you just don’t want to anymore.
It’s like “oh my god another error, another video to cut, another thing to do.” Even if it’s nothing spectacularly difficulty or complex and you even know how to do it. You’re annoyed, sometimes you’re not motivated and I think it’s not always easy but you really need to focus on the right things, push yourself through. I listen to a lot of great entrepreneurial books and listen to a lot of great speakers, motivational stuff and also talk to Michael and my other mentors through it and just did that. It truly helped me but just be aware of it don’t go in with the expectations that it’s going to be very easy because then you’re going to bump into the first road block. I think for the next project I will definitely keep that in mind and go into the expectation knowing that it will suck at times. At the same time I know I have the ability to push through and it’s well worth pushing through.
6. Strategize everything on PAPER.
Lesson six I strategize everything on paper. This was huge for me because while I love technology and I’m quite a tech geek. I love hanging around on all the forums and all of the blogs, and just reading what people say and learn a lot of things from technology- there is a time when it’s better to be off line. I surprisingly found that the longer I spent off line strategizing everything I wanted to get done on the day or in the project or the weeks on paper, the more effective I was. Way more effective.
What I do now is every day I journal on things and prepare my actions. It may just be some simple things like the layout of the website, or where a button should be, or which colour something should be. It’s just amazing what paper can do for you if you just get off the computer for a while and go back in with a lot more clarity.
7. Schedule your time wisely and embrace RULES.
Even though we all want to have the freedom and lifestyle to be able to do whatever we want, I think what we ultimately want is still have some sort of freedom to choose but set rules ourselves. We ultimately don’t want to live without rules. They may work for a while, while you’re on vacation or something but ultimately you need rules especially if you want to be productive and get something done.
I always had a pretty tight schedule some weeks it was more planned out than others but in general I set a schedule and I have my rules. For example the biggest rule for me was no e-mail prior to noon and to that day I still keep that rule and because it just helps tremendously to get things done before you check your e-mail.
8. GET a Mentor! BE a Mentor!
Then number eight, get a mentor and be a mentor. As I said I worked together with Michael and I also worked together with Clive our copywriter. Both of them are tremendous mentors of mine. They helped me a lot on various aspects of the project. Also they keep you not only accountable but they really can give you feedback and perspective on a lot of things. You can just bounce back ideas from them, but at the same time you need to remember that all of these people, as amazing as they are, they all have their challenges. They all have their imperfections and don’t know everything. They need some advice as well.
This works for everyone because no one is perfect. Once you understand and accept that then you also know that everyone can need help and that you always know something that will help them because they don’t know it. It could just be a fresh perspective on something, but really make sure that you embrace that and help them out.
9. Set 2 deadlines.
Lesson number nine, set two deadlines. This was something that came across more or less by accident. Michael wanted to set a deadline roughly four weeks prior to launch we set a deadline. I was pushing for the quick deadline because I know that I get myself to follow through a lot better when I have a short and really tight deadline.
He came up with the idea of, “Well let’s do an internal launch first without a lot of affiliates or no affiliates at all, and then push out to the official launch.” I pushed for having another deadline way earlier and I think that was great, because now I got myself to follow through a lot better and pushed hard and worked a lot of hours to get this done. Ultimately what ended up happening was that we missed the internal launch deadline, we missed it completely but we were ready for the official launch. I think if we wouldn’t have had the first deadline in the first place, we would have just missed both deadlines.
It was great having the second deadline where you have to deliver but it’s without a huge risk. It would just have a benefit. It would have been cool if we would have been able to launch earlier but at the same time now there’s no real risk involved. That was tremendously helpful and I aim to use that in other projects like my study papers at the university or other things as well.
10. Do it once and you can do it forever!
Then the last lesson, do it once and you can do it forever. The project was so worth it for me just as a personal experience, because I’ve grown so much I think throughout the whole project. I’ve proven to myself that I can do it and that is the biggest aspect of it. I’ve learned a lot, I’ve honed my craft in design and it all came together nicely. I’m very proud of the product and I also think I’ve done a great shift in my mindset. Because now I have a new belief that says that I can freaking do it.
Before it was like you know whenever I wanted to do something my mind would like “yell yeah remember the time when you screwed up this thing? When you procrastinate when you said you would do this and you had this great idea but you didn’t do anything on it? Now I say, well you know when you did that that was really cool. Like you finished it and you did a great job on it and I think that was so helpful. Now with that new belief I can build on this and I can push through much more easily on new projects because I have completed it.
This were some of the biggest lessons that I learned from Michael over the past months, I hope they’ve been helpful to you. It has definitely been a great experience so far, I am proud and really excited about how the product is going to do in the long run. I have learned a tremendous amount and…
Photo Credit: Pulse world
There are four people you need to forgive if you are serious about changing your life and learning how to live in the now.
The first are your parents, living or dead. You must absolutely forgive them for every mistake they ever made in bringing you up. At the very least, you should be grateful to them for giving you life. They got you here. If you are happy to be alive, you can forgive them for everything else. Never complain about them again.
By not forgiving your parents, you remain forever a child. You block your own chance to grow up and become a fully functioning adult. You continue to see yourself as a victim. Even worse, you keep your negative feelings of inferiority and anger alive. If your parents die without your having forgiven them, it can bother you for the rest of your life.
Your Partner (Spouse or mate)
The second person or persons you must forgive are the people from your marriages or relationships that didn’t work out. These intimate relationships can be so intense, and so threatening to your feelings of self-esteem and self-worth, that you can be angry and unforgiving toward those people for years.
But you were at least partially responsible. Have the personal strength and integrity to say, “I am responsible,” and then forgive the other person and let him or her go. Say the words, “I forgive him/her for everything and I wish him/her well.” Each time you repeat this, the negative emotion attached to the memory will diminish. Soon it will be gone forever.
Many have found that “the letter” is the key to putting a bad relationship behind them forever. This is a powerful technique that can free you from feelings of anger and resentment almost instantly.
Here is how it works: You to sit down and write the other person a letter of forgiveness. It consists of three parts.
First you say, “I forgive you for everything you ever did that hurt me.”
Second, you write out a description or list of every single thing that you are still mad about. Some people write several pages in this part.
Third, you end the letter with the words, “I wish you well.”
You then take the letter to the mailbox and drop it in. At that moment, you will feel a huge sense of relief, and you will be free at last.
By the way, don’t worry about how the other person might react. That is not your concern. Your goal is to free yourself, to regain your peace of mind, and to get on with the wonderful life that lies ahead of you.
Those who hurt you
The third person you must forgive is everyone else in your life who has ever hurt you in any way. Let them go. Forgive every boss, business partner, friend, crook or betrayer who has ever caused you grief of any kind. Clean the slate and forgive to forget. Wipe each of their names and images off by saying, “I forgive him/her for everything, and I wish him/her well.” Repeat this statement each time you think of the person or situation until the negative feelings are gone.
The fourth and final person you have to forgive is yourself. You must absolutely forgive yourself for every silly, senseless, wicked, brainless, thoughtless or cruel thing you have ever done or said. Stop carrying these past mistakes around with you. That was then and this is now.
Think of it this way. When you did those things in the past that you still feel badly about, you were not the person you are today. At that time, you were a different person, younger and less experienced. You were not your true self. You were an immature version of the person you have become with experience. Stop beating yourself up for something that occurred in the past that you cannot change.
Just say, “I forgive myself for every mistake I ever made. I am a thoroughly good person and I am going to have a wonderful future.” Whenever you think of that event or situation, just repeat, “I forgive myself completely.” And then get on with your life. Focus on the future rather than the past and don’t look back. Look at where you are going rather than where you have been.
Finally, if you did something that hurt someone, and you still feel badly about it, you can go to that person, or write, and apologize. Tell the person you are sorry for what you did or said. Whatever his or her reaction, positive or negative, it doesn’t matter. The very act of repentance, of expressing regret, will set you free.
Posted from WordPress for BlackBerry.
Good evening dear friends, it’s amazing how far God has brought us. In a few hours time, we will be stepping into a new decade. Let’s take few minutes to look at how we can promote our mental health in our homes.
MENTAL HEALTH PROMOTION IN THE HOME
As we strive to meet the physical needs of our children, it’s equally important to promote good mental health in them. We can achieve this by doing some of the following:
These and many more can help us raise better children and mentally/emotionally healthy children. Our children! Our hope! Thank you for reading. More feedbacks and contributions are welcome. See you in the next post.
Written by: Dr. Rebecca Ekochin
Hello friends, as we roll into 2020 and make our numerous new year resolutions, let’s also look at ways of promoting our mental health positively.These include:
Thank you so much for reading. We will be looking at mental health promotion strategies for families and societies soon. Keep the conversation going 👍👍👍
Written by Rebecca Ekochin
Good day dear friends, trust you all had a great weekend. We are still on the subject of building resilience. Children and Young people are also exposed to stressful circumstances such as bullying, abuse and even circumstances similar to what is encountered by adults. The right experiences can help in shaping intrinsic qualities of children via brain rewiring. Hence the need to empower them with resilience building skills. This evening, we will be focusing on this.
Hope the above tips will come in handy. Thank you for reading. You can join the conversation and follow us also on twitter: AsktheshrinkDr.
Written by Dr. Rebecca Ekochin
Hello friends, hope the ongoing series has been helpful. Today’s post will be dealing with resilience and its relationship with having a good mental health. We will also briefly look at how to build resilience.
Resilience refers to the ability to deal with the adversities of life and bounce back from them. It is all about being emotionally balanced. Difficult times are normal in life and are accompanied by a lot of sadness, anxiety and stress. Here’s where resilience comes into play. Individuals with good mental health are resilient.They are able to bounce back from all forms of adversity, be it a loss, an illness or any other setback. Even though some people seem to be resilient naturally, resilience can also be developed through certain thoughts and behaviours.
Resilience can be built through the following ways:
(1) Accept that change is a normal part of living.
(2) Make good, strong and positive connections with family, friends, co-workers and others.
(3) Avoid seeing crises as insurmountable, rather work towards a solution
(4) Take decisive steps during stressful moments
(5) Have realistic goals and work towards achieving them.
(6) Try to learn something good from any situation.
(7) Maintain a positive outlook about life.
(8) Avoid blowing things out of proportion.
(9) Develop your confidence and have a positive view of yourself.
(10) Understand that setbacks are temporary and you have the skills and abilities to combat whatever challenges that may arise.
(11) Develop good problem solving skills- make a quick list of potential solutions whenever problems arise.
These are some of the ways we can build resilience as adults. It should be noted however, that it can take time to build it, but don’t despair, keep practising these skills and more.
See you soon in our next post.
Written by Dr. Rebecca Ekochin
Photo Credit: Salesforce.com
I saw this funny analogy of government around the world and taught it is worth sharing.
#SOCIALISM: You have two cows, and you give one to your neighbor.
#COMMUNISM: You have two cows, the government takes both and gives you milk.
#FASCISM: You have two cows, the government takes both and sells you milk.
#NAZISM: You have two cows, the government takes them and kills you.
#CAPITALISM: You have two cows, you sell one and buy a male. You multiply your cows and there is economic growth. You sell them, you retire and you live on your profits.
#MODERN_CAPITALISM: You have two cows, you sell one and buy a male. You multiply your cows and you buy those of your neighbors. Then your neighbors become your shepherds, you pay them in monkey currencies and they die poor.
#AMERICAN_SOCIETY: You have two cows, you sell one and you have to make the other one to produce milk like Four cows. By stress of producing beyond her capacity, she dies. You hire a consultant to understand this death.
#FRENCH_SOCIETY: You have two cows, you go on strike because you want a third cow.
#GERMAN_SOCIETY: You have two cows, you modify them so that they live 100 years, eat once a month and take care of themselves.
#CHINESE_SOCIETY: You have two cows, you sell milk to your compatriots and you produce plastic milk to export to the rest of the world. You become rich.
#BLACK_AFRICAN_SOCIETY: You have two cows, you eat them all in one month, and you dream that donors or the international community give you more cows. When that doesn’t happen, you go to religious houses and hope for miracle cows. You begin to fast days and nights without eating or drinking and continue to speak in all kind of tongue, so that the cows will fall from Heaven. At last You die in extreme poverty.
Kenyan runner Abel Mutai was just a few feet from the finish line, but became confused with the signage and stopped, thinking he had completed the race.
A Spanish runner, Ivan Fernandez, was right behind him and, realizing what was happening, started shouting at the Kenyan to continue running. Mutai didn’t know Spanish and didn’t understand. Realizing what was taking place, Fernandez pushed Mutai to victory.
A journalist asked Ivan, “Why did you do that?” Ivan replied, “My dream is that someday we can have a kind of community life where we push and help each other to win.”
The journalist insisted “But why did you let the Kenyan win?” Ivan replied, “I didn’t let him win, he was going to win. The race was his.” The journalist insisted, and again asked, “But you could have won!”
Ivan looked at him and replied, “But what would be the merit of my victory? What would be the honor in that medal?What would my Mother think of that?”
Values are passed on from generation to generation.
Lets learn to push others to succeed and be happy that they do
What values are we teaching our children?
Let us not teach our kids the wrong ways and means to WIN.
Instead, let us pass on the beauty and humanity of a helping hand. Because honesty and ethics are WINNING!