Child Bride

 

Photo credit. unfpa.org

Under age marriage.

Talking about underage marriage, in Africa we are the center of underage marriage in the world.

I am from Nigeria and I live in the North Western Nigeria (am from the North Eastern part of Nigeria), and the North West is where underage marriage is mostly practice.

I stay in Sokoto where underage marriage is a norm and not seen as bad, Sokoto have a very high cases of women living with Vesicular Virginal Fistula (VVF).

Underage marriage is a marriage between one of the two (or both) person involve in the marriage contract or agreements. I am looking at underage marriage not in the context of birth age (18 being legal or official), but looking at the persons as not being matured physiologically. Mentally, physically, and emotionally not being matured is also tagged as being underage. The girl child are mostly the most affected by this.

I am writing about underage marriage, I was in a village in Sokoto for a research work, and my guide a young boy of about 9 – 11 years of age said a statement that almost brought tears to my eyes.

Faruku and his friend saw a small girl passing by and his friend said “har anyi ma yarinya nan wanka” which means this in English “This girl has already been married off”. Then Faruku said they are just suffering this girl, they went ahead to talked about other young girls who are even in their matrimonial homes.

These young boys feel bad about the underage marriage, what saddens me was a young man who was with us and he sees nothing wrong with the girls being married off ag that young age, he is even trying to defend the practice and fault those you boys and being boys and don’t know anything yet. During this discussion a lot was going on in my mind and here are a few of them.

1. How do these young boys know that these girls are too young for marriage?
2. How come this young man don’t see the evil of this practice?
3. Are these young boys truly too young to know what is marriage?
4. Will they still hold on to this believe as they grow up as underage marriage is bad?
5. How come the people of this community welcome such a practice?

As I finished my work and headed back home I was just disturbed in my spirit and I remember when I visit Maryam Abatcha Women and Children Hospital Sokoto, I saw so many women young girls most of them about 13 – 15 years of age suffering from VVF. I begin to wonder how did they get to this state and what is the solution?

I think more awareness and enlightenment and sex/reproductive health education has to be intensify to get everyone aware and enlighten. Leaders and elders of the communities need to be involve in this awareness campaign.

I pray there will be more voices who will  rise up and speak about this.

We Need To Turn A Blind Eye For Peace

In live we come across stories that bring great morals and lessons for life.

Today’s story holds a great lesson for all.

A man married a beautiful girl. He loved her very much. One day she developed a skin disease. Slowly she started to lose her beauty. It so happened that one day her husband left for a tour.

While returning he met with an accident and lost his eyesight. However their married life continued as usual. But as days passed she lost her beauty gradually. Blind husband did not know this and there was not any difference in their married life. He continued to love her and she also loved him very much.

One day she died. Her death brought him great sorrow.

He finished all her last rites and wanted to leave that town.

A man from behind called and said, now how will you be able to walk all alone? All these days your wife used to help you.

He replied, I am not blind. I was acting, because if she knew l could see her ugliness it would have pained her more than her disease. So I pretended to be blind. She was a very good wife. I only wanted to keep her happy.

Moral:- Some times it is good for us to act blind and ignore one another’s short comings, in order to be happy

No matter how many times the teeth bite the tongue, they still stay together in one mouth. That’s the spirit of FORGIVENESS. Even though the eyes don’t see each other, they see things together, blink simultaneously and cry together. That’s UNITY.” May God grant us all the spirit of forgiveness and togetherness.

1. ”Alone, I can ‘Say’ but together, we can ‘talk’.

2. “Alone, I can ‘Enjoy’ but together, we can celebrate

3. ‘Alone, I can ‘Smile’ but together, we can ‘Laugh’.

That’s the BEAUTY of Human Relations. We are nothing without each other

The razor blade is sharp but can’t cut a tree; the axe is strong but can’t cut the hair.

MORALS: Everyone is important according to his/her purpose. Never look down on anyone unless you are admiring their shoes.

Share to educate someone.

Stay positive

If it is not right, do not do it.

If it is not true, do not say it.

-Marcus Aurelius

7 THINGS YOU CAN NEVER CHANGE TILL YOU CHANGE

Photo Credit:http://elizabethbcrook.com

1. You can never Change the way people treat you till you change the way you treat people.

Matthew 7:12 (NIV)

So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.

1. You can not Change your character until you change your friends.

1 Corinthians 15:33 (NIV)

Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”

1. You can not change what you harvest until you change what you sow.

Galatians 6:7 (NIV)

Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.

1. You can not change the direction of your life until you change the driver.

Exodus 23:2 NIV

“Do not follow the crowd in doing wrong…”

Your life is either driven by the crowd or by your conviction

1. You can not change your financial situation until you Change your financial behaviour.

Proverbs 21:17 (NIV)

“Whoever loves pleasure will become poor; whoever loves wine and olive oil will never be rich.”

Life-style poverty is the bane of many.

1. You can not change me until you change you.

Matthew 7:3 (NLT)

“And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when have a log in your own?”

1. You can not change the way you think until you change you hear, read and watch.

Proverbs 23:7 (KJV)

“let the wise listen and add to their learning,…”

Who you listen to determines what you learn, What you learn determines the information in your head, The information in your head determines your decisions, And your decisions determine your direction in life.

Remain blessed and rapturable

Rev’d Samaila John Samuel

HOW TO INSPIRE MANNERS IN YOUR CHILDREN.

My family

Raising children with good “manners” is very difficult in this Post it, Share it, Like it, Tweet it, Pin it, Upload and download world.
The Best way if by inspiring them by living out what you want them to be.

1. When entering the house greet your children or even hug them. This should help develop their sense of love and self worth.

2. Be good to your neighbours and never backbite. Never speak ill of other drivers when on the road. Your children would listen, absorb and emulate.

3. When calling your parents, encourage your children to speak to them. When visiting your parents take your children with you. The more they see you take care of your parents the more they will learn to take care of you.

4. When driving them to school, don’t always play albums or cds in the car. Rather, tell them some motivational stories yourself. This will have a greater impact – trust me!

5. Read to them a short story and even a scripture a day – it doesn’t take much time, but very impactful in creating strong bonds and wonderful memories.

6. Comb your hair, clean your teeth and wear presentable cloths even if sitting at home and not going out for the day. They need to learn that being clean and tidy has nothing to do with going out!

7. Try not to blame or comment on every word or action they say or do. Learn to overlook and let go sometimes. This certainly builds their self-confidence.

8. Ask your children’s permission before entering their rooms. Don’t just knock and enter, but then wait for a verbal permission. They will learn to do the same when wanting to enter your room.

9. Apologize to your children if you made a mistake. Apologizing teaches them to be humble and polite.

10. Don’t be sarcastic or make fun of their views or feelings, even if you “didn’t mean it” and was “only joking”. ~It really hurts~

11. Show respect to your children’s privacy. Its important for their sense of value and self-esteem.

12. Don’t expect that they will listen or understand the first time. Don’t take it personal. But be patient and consistent.

13.Pray with them. Show them how to pray. Lead by example.

1. In addition, ask them to discuss their daily plans after the morning prayers. Children without concrete daily plans usually join others in executing theirs. They fall easy to peer pressure.

15.Hold them and bless them specially every morning. Please share with other parents.

God bless you for your time

IZ

Thoughts And Words

Photo Credit: dailytenminutes.com

Live runs by thoughts and words.

When you are alone watch your THOUGHTS and when you are with people watch your WORDS.

Words are powerful they have the ability to Create, to make, to empower, sustain, to kill and to give live.

As powerful as words are they are not as powerful as thoughts.

Watch your thoughts because you become what you think, and out of the abundance of your thoughts you speak.

 

Tough Truths that Help You Grow

photo Credit: Study.com

As you look back on your life, you will often realize that many of the times you thought you were being rejected from something good, you were in fact being redirected to something better. You can’t control everything. Sometimes you just need to relax and have faith that things will work out. Let go a little and just let life happen. Because sometimes the truths you can’t change, end up changing you and helping you grow.

Here are twelve such truths…

1 Everything is as it should be. It’s crazy how you always end up where you’re meant to be – how even the most tragic and stressful situations eventually teach you important lessons that you never dreamed you were going to learn. Remember, oftentimes when things are falling apart, they are actually falling into place. 

2 Not until you are lost in this world can you begin to find your true self. Realizing you are lost is the first step to living the life you want. The second step is leaving the life you don’t want. Making a big life change is pretty scary. But you know what’s even scarier? Regret. Vision without action is a daydream, and action without vision is a nightmare. Your heart is free, have the courage to follow it. Read Awaken the Giant Within. 

3 It’s usually the deepest pain which empowers you to grow to your full potential. It’s the scary, stressful choices that end up being the most worthwhile. Without pain, there would be no change. But remember, pain, just like everything in life, is meant to be learned from and then released. 

4 One of the hardest decisions you will ever face in life is choosing whether to walk away or take another step forward. If you catch yourself in a cycle of trying to change someone, or defending yourself again someone who is trying to change you, walk away. But if you are pursuing a dream, take another step. And don’t forget that sometimes this step will involve modifying your dream, or planning a new one – it’s OK to change your mind or have more than one dream.

 5 You have to take care of yourself first. Before befriending others, you have to be your own friend. Before correcting others, you have to correct yourself. Before making others happy, you have to make yourself happy. It’s not called selfishness, it’s called personal development. Once you balance yourself, only then can you balance the world around you. Read Psycho-Cybernetics. 

6 One of the greatest freedoms is truly not caring what everyone else thinks of you. As long as you are worried about what others think of you, you are owned by them. Only when you require no approval from outside yourself, can you own yourself.

 7 You may need to be single for awhile before you realize that, although the co-owned belongings from your failed relationships might not have been divided equally, the issues that destroyed the relationships likely were. For how can you stand confidently alone, or see the same issues arising in your newest relationship, and not realize which broken pieces belong to you? Owning your issues, and dealing with them, will make you far happier in the long run, than owning anything else in this world.

 8 The only thing you can absolutely control is how you react to things out of your control. The more you can adapt to the situations in life, the more powerful your highs will be, and the more quickly you’ll be able to bounce back from the lows in your life. Put most simply: being at peace means being in a state of complete acceptance of all that is, right here, right now.

 9 Some people will lie to you. Remember, an honest enemy is better than a friend who lies. Pay less attention to what people say, and more attention to what they do. Their actions will show you the truth, which will help you measure the true quality of your relationship in the long-term.

 10 If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never have enough. If you are thankful for what you do have, you will end up having even more. Happiness resides not in possessions, and not in gold; happiness dwells in the soul. Abundance is not about how much you have, it’s how you feel about what you have. When you take things for granted, your happiness gets taken away. Read The Happiness Project.

 11 Yes, you have failed in the past. But don’t judge yourself by your past, you don’t live there anymore. Just because you’re not where you want to be today doesn’t mean you won’t be there someday. You can turn it all around in the blink of an eye by making a simple choice to stand back up – to try again, to love again, to live again, and to dream again.

 12 Everything is going to be alright; maybe not today, but eventually. There will be times when it seems like everything that could possibly go wrong is going wrong. And you might feel like you will be stuck in this rut forever, but you won’t. Sure the sun stops shining sometimes, and you may get a huge thunderstorm or two, but eventually the sun will come out to shine. Sometimes it’s just a matter of us staying as positive as possible in order to make it to see the sunshine break through the clouds again.

Just allow life to take its course you cannot change everything and everyone.

 

Copied.