How To Choose The Right Partner

When you step into the world of dating, many may come along and claim that they are perfect for you. Then how do you distinguish the genuinely good ones from the bad ones? Listed below are some traits that you must look out for in a perfect partner.

1. Loyalty
If they can’t stay loyal, they will not be able to love you enough. You will never be happy with a person like that. No matter what happens, never date a philanderer.

2. Maturity
Maturity refers to knowing how to behave in a particular place and a particular time. Maturity does not depend upon the age of a person. It is attained through sufficient experience.

3. Independence
This refers to someone who has the potential to keep you happy. Don’t date someone who will only depend on you for every single thing.

4. Commitment
Commitment is very important in a relationship. Look out for someone who wishes to have a long term relationship with you. Run away from a person who keeps changing his mind

5. Security.
Go for someone who can make you feel secured both physically, emotionally and financially.

6. Respect.
Go for someone who will not only respect you but also respect those who are important to you.

7. Good sense of humor.
Go for someone who will make life lively for you. Laughter heals wounds & act as catalyst in r/s.

8. Similarities.
Go for someone who shares similar hobbies, taste, preferences like you to avoid clash of interest.

9. Smartness.
Go for someone who is more intelligent and wiser than you.

10. Romantic & affectionate.
Go for someone who can make you feel special.

11. Easy to understand.
Go for someone who you can easily blend with.

12. Sensitivity.
Go for someone who is sensitive to your feelings and needs.

IF YOU HAVE GOTTEN ONE, PLEASE DON’T LET HIM GO.
By Paul M. Wakawa

Child Bride

 

Photo credit. unfpa.org

Under age marriage.

Talking about underage marriage, in Africa we are the center of underage marriage in the world.

I am from Nigeria and I live in the North Western Nigeria (am from the North Eastern part of Nigeria), and the North West is where underage marriage is mostly practice.

I stay in Sokoto where underage marriage is a norm and not seen as bad, Sokoto have a very high cases of women living with Vesicular Virginal Fistula (VVF).

Underage marriage is a marriage between one of the two (or both) person involve in the marriage contract or agreements. I am looking at underage marriage not in the context of birth age (18 being legal or official), but looking at the persons as not being matured physiologically. Mentally, physically, and emotionally not being matured is also tagged as being underage. The girl child are mostly the most affected by this.

I am writing about underage marriage, I was in a village in Sokoto for a research work, and my guide a young boy of about 9 – 11 years of age said a statement that almost brought tears to my eyes.

Faruku and his friend saw a small girl passing by and his friend said “har anyi ma yarinya nan wanka” which means this in English “This girl has already been married off”. Then Faruku said they are just suffering this girl, they went ahead to talked about other young girls who are even in their matrimonial homes.

These young boys feel bad about the underage marriage, what saddens me was a young man who was with us and he sees nothing wrong with the girls being married off ag that young age, he is even trying to defend the practice and fault those you boys and being boys and don’t know anything yet. During this discussion a lot was going on in my mind and here are a few of them.

1. How do these young boys know that these girls are too young for marriage?
2. How come this young man don’t see the evil of this practice?
3. Are these young boys truly too young to know what is marriage?
4. Will they still hold on to this believe as they grow up as underage marriage is bad?
5. How come the people of this community welcome such a practice?

As I finished my work and headed back home I was just disturbed in my spirit and I remember when I visit Maryam Abatcha Women and Children Hospital Sokoto, I saw so many women young girls most of them about 13 – 15 years of age suffering from VVF. I begin to wonder how did they get to this state and what is the solution?

I think more awareness and enlightenment and sex/reproductive health education has to be intensify to get everyone aware and enlighten. Leaders and elders of the communities need to be involve in this awareness campaign.

I pray there will be more voices who will  rise up and speak about this.

DEAR SINGLE LADIES

1 hour ago
(1)Dear Single Ladies, Stop giving your heart and body to everyone; Just because they tell you the right things doesn’t make them the right one. Everybody doesn’t deserve you!

(2)Dear Single Ladies, You will never find the RIGHT person if you never let go of the WRONG one. #BeSmart!

(3)Dear Single Ladies, Stop advertising yourself as wholesale when your value should be something that can’t be bought
#ValueYourself!

(4)Dear Single Ladies, relationSHIPS sink when you invite people on a journey that’s only made for TWO #BeWise!

(5)Dear Single Ladies, a man will treat you according to the “messages” you put out; If you exude sex, you will attract men who want that from you, If you exude self respect, you will attract the type of men who respect women. You will always attract what you exude. #WhatDoYouExude?

(6)Dear Single Ladies, When it’s REAL….you don’t get a promise, you get a commitment #BeWise

(7)Dear Single Ladies, Never let your thirst cause your perception to mis-label someone’s intention; Learn how to take a compliment without creating SOMETHING in your mind that doesn’t exist

(8)Dear Single Ladies, Carrying yourself with no respect will always get you attention from the people who aren’t meant to love you! #RespectYourself!

(9)Dear Single Ladies, If you carry bricks from your past relationships into a new one, you will always end up building the same house #YouAreNotYourPast!

(10)Dear Single Ladies, No relationship is worth losing your character and integrity. If you can’t have you, they can’t either!

(11)Dear Single Ladies, Love isn’t untrue, Love doesn’t hurt, Love doesn’t lie; Love is LOYAL, honest and pure. Stop settling for less than what your heart deserves #GetYourWorth!

(12)Dear Single Ladies, Never make excuses for someone who disrespects you. Who they are or what they do isn’t a pass to treat you like trash.

(13)Dear Single Ladies, Stop making yourself so available. There’s nothing special about being easy access #WiseUp!

(14)Dear Single Ladies, There’s nothing like a woman who has a honest lip, LOVES GOD, has a pure heart, walks in the heels of confidence and isn’t afraid of her flaws!!! #DoesThisDescribeYou?

written by Ibrahim Gana Malgwi